Regular Joe

Allow me to be frank from the very start; I don’t want you to like me. In fact, you will not like me! The simple, naked truth always hearts. It always causes… disasters. “In fact you will like me a good deal less as we go on” – that’s what the story tells.
I’m here to tell the truth. I’m here to speak!

Just a little story before I say my piece:
It’s about a young man in his early 20’s. He has hopes and dreams, good health, a fairly nice body and fairly good looks. Pretty intelligent too. Just as anyone. Just like you, or… you, or me!

We can say that he’s ready to conquer the world. For him nothing else matter than his hopes and dreams. They are his number one priority. His hopes and dreams are what define him. He is HIS NUMBER ONE PRIORITY. He is on the first place in his life. He might have other things to concern but, for sure, they must be at least second to his priority list.

Sounds familiar! If I’ll ask you NOW and you will be totally honest, 100% honest. No lies, no bull shit: who’s the most important person in your life RIGHT NOW? The answer must be you. It is you, no one else. Nothing else. Your hopes and dreams matter the most. You matter the most! You are on the first place in your life.

I’ll make the story short. Few years in the future he meets a fairly nice girl and they get along well. Perhaps they’re in love. Perhaps they share hopes and dreams. For a very short period of time they BOTH are on the first place in their lives. No one else and nothing else matters but them: him and her. Both of them, together, are on the first spot.

But all sunny days must have an end, right? They’ll probably get married.

It is the most basic law of the nature, the simplest of all facts and laws of the evolution on this planet; there is only ONE on the top of the food chain. Not TWO! JUST ONE! One of them must become more “powerful” and claim the first place in their lives only for him… or her. Let’s suppose that she becomes more “powerful”. She is number one so he’s left with the second position.

But she’s in for a surprise as well. The nice girl becomes a wife; with a house to clean, a car to own, a social status to gain, a mother to concern. All of these WILL become more important. All of these will hold, for a short period of time, the number one position in their lives. Maybe it’ll be the house first. It’ll probably be the house first. The house will claim the number one position. That means the wife is second and the young man third, right! Just a few months in the future and the house will be second to the social status. We’re human. We like to brag about our poor achievements, to receive some sort of general or, at least, a somewhat wide appreciation and acceptation. The social status does that for us. So! Simple math: social status first, house second, wife third, young man forth.

Oh, I don’t want to be in the poor fellow’s shoes when the mother in law will storm into their lives! And she will! That’s what mother in law do best. Wife needs her mother (“what! You don’t like my mother?”) and the guy doesn’t have a choice (No, sugar cup! Of course I like your mother”). All hell will brake loose. The mother in law WILL RULE.. She’ll rule and she’ll be a tyrant (tiran); worse than Hitler and twice as bloody than Stalin. She will accept nothing else than the first place. Poor fellow is stuck with… what! I’ve forgot! …yes, the fifth place. The fifth place in his life.

There is only one thing that can suppress the mother in law dictatorship. You probably guessed. Yes, it’s the kid! The kid is born! The KING is born!

You can figure out the rest. The mortgage, the first car, the second car, the wide screen plasma TV, the kid’s karate lessons, the pet dog, even the TV’s remote control, the second mortgage, the innocent crush for the girl in the accountancy department, the son’s first girlfriend, wife’s first liposuction surgery, the middle age crises, wife’s menopause etc, etc, etc. Any of those things, events, persons, WILL become most important in his life. Any of the above will be on the first place in his life. Number one.

As the story goes he becomes the 111’th in his life.
The story ends here! No happy end. No brilliant escape. No wise conclusion. The simple truth. Just a life story that repeats over and over… for so many of us.

There is just ONE thing I did not tell you. All along this story, all along his life the guy liked being second – he felt somewhat relieved from the pressure of being number one - loved being the third, enjoyed being the forth. Hell, he didn’t even complain when his mother in law took the first position and he got stuck with the fifth! He kept saying: “second place is not that bad. I’m so close to the first position that I can touch the victor in my life. Third place is more than OK. My flag is still on the winners stand, flying in the wind… Forth place is fine, so close to the podium. I can almost breathe the same air with the winners. So what if I’m the fifth? I can’t compete forever! I can still see the winners. Sixth place is cool. No one bothers me here. In fact, no one even notices me. I can do anything I want on the 7th place. Nobody will care anyway!” etc, etc

In fact, when he finally sets on the 111th place he says “the 111th place is the greatest ever. Nothing matters anymore. I don’t matter anymore. It is virtually impossible to even conceive the thought of catching up and at least take a short, quick gleams at the victors in my life. To the Victor deserve the spoil. I’m left with the bitter sorrow of my broken hopes and dreams. All along these sad years there is only one hope left for me. This hope is what keeps me going and makes my life bearable: GOD, I HOPE I’M STILL YOUR NUMBER ONE!”

That’s Regular Joe all right! 100% Regular Joe! The real, genuine Regular Joe. Just like each and anyone of us. Just like you, or… you, or me.

You will not like me when I’ll tell you the cold, naked truth. THIS IS WHAT’S IN FRONT OF US. There is no day and night happiness. There is no land of milk and honey. There is no out of the regular, beyond of the known boundaries existence. We will not be exceptional. We will not live exceptional lives. We will not have a special destiny! NOTHING SPECIAL. ALL ORDINARY, REGULAR, AVERAGE. Average people, with and average job, having an average marriage, owning an average house, paying average mortgage, driving an average size car, getting some average fun… from time to time!

Should I go further? Should I reveal the KNOWN facts which we forget so easily? Should I tell you that two thirds (2/3) of us will be struggling with the overweight problems by the time we hit 30, 30% of us will even be obsesses, half of us will experience their first divorce until we reach 40 and 20% will … die of cancer until we reach 60.

It sounds dreadful but is just the simple naked truth and the truth always hearts and causes… disasters.
You’re angry at me and you already said to yourself “I’m not like that, I’m different. I’m not a Regular Joe! I have hopes and dreams. I will not end up like that… not me! Anyone else and everyone else probably will… but not me. I’m special. I’m number one.”

You see the irony…

And if I managed to raise a tiny little question mark deep inside your pretty intelligent brain, if I managed to shook you a little beet from your profound admiration of your average yourselves, of what you are right now and what you will become, you’ll still be angry at me. You will NOT like me! because one cannot point the finger without offering an escape too. I’ve prosecuted the world, I’ve laid down the sentence – a life time sentence with no parole – but you expect of me to come up with the solution as well. Some sort of rehabilitation program. Right?

Perhaps I do have a solution. I not saying I’ve managed to implement it and prove it successfully. Maybe I’m too weak. I’m nothing more than a Regular Joe after all. A Regular Joe with an attitude.

If I have the solution you will not be ready to implement it. Your hopes and dreams will prevent you from accepting it. Your hopes and dreams will deny you the right to happiness. Isn’t this ironic!

So simple! So, so SIMPLE...

The solution is so SIMPLE. We all see it. It’s right in front of our eyes. No need to spend a life time searching for it. No need to go down to the 111th position and discover it.

You haven’t guessed yet… No, it is not the religion. The poor guy was wrong even after a life time of average misery. It cannot be the money, the wife, the kid, the house, the social status, the wide screen plasma TV, the pet dog, the innocent crush for the girl in accountancy... Those of you who might think that the mother in law is the answer are really sick!

It’s not any of those things, events or persons and it is not all of them together.

So simple! So, so SIMPLE...

The solution is so SIMPLE. It just waits for us to find it and grab it.

We are not ready for it! YOU ARE NOT READY FOR IT! Waist of time…

So there it lies at the last on the deaf bed… convert. The pious debauchee. I could not dance half of measure, could I? Give me wine I drink the dregs and toss the empty bottle at the world! Show me our Lord Jesus in agony, and I mount the cross and steal his nails for my own palms. There I go. Shuffling from the world, my dribbled flesh upon a Bible. I look upon a pinhead… and I see angels dancing.
Do you like me now?
Do you like me NOW?
Do you like me now!?

Do you like me… now!”

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